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Happening ... in the Local Church
 Aireonna
Walz reads aloud as her sister, Yesenia, and cousin, Kaylynn, play in
the nursery during a Couples’ Night Out at Our Lady of Grace Parish in
Noblesville. (Photos by Katy Harrison Troxell) |
 Tina
Renz entertains Colton Starkey, 20 months, in the busy gym during a
Couples’ Night Out earlier this summer at Our Lady of Grace Parish in
Noblesville. |
By Katy Harrison Troxell
For The
Catholic Moment
NOBLESVILLE — Imagine your neighbor telling you that in exchange for watching her children four nights a year, she would watch your children 20 times. Sounds too good to be true, right? Not if your neighbor is Our Lady of Grace Church. There resides a group, Couples’ Night Out, which was formed to give married couples a chance to reconnect and date … without the kids.
In 1999, Couples’ Night Out (CNO) evolved out of discussions from married couples with children, who were trying to figure out a way to make it easier to go out on dates, enrich their marriages and have time alone. Most parents shared two reasons why their date lives were lagging: difficulty in finding a babysitter and finding the money to pay the babysitter.
Ten years later, the group is going strong. Here’s how it works: Two Friday nights each month are designated for Couples’ Night Out. The evening begins with drop-off at 6:30 p.m. and pickup at 10 p.m. CNO members are divided into six teams of six couples each. Each team is required to work once a quarter. In exchange, they get date nights, and lots of them — 20 nights in a year.
Linda Perkins joined Our Lady of Grace Parish in 1990, and her husband, Rick, joined when they married in 1993.
They joined CNO in the group’s inaugural year, when their son, Zach, was 10 months old. Their own protective parental instincts, along with a lack of family in the area, made date nights non-existent for the Perkinses before joining CNO.
“I was so excited to be a part of such a great program,” Linda said. “Rick, on the other hand, was not as excited when I told him I had signed us up. He said, ‘What do you mean I have to watch 36 families’ kids?!’”
Rick quickly came to see that the payback for one night worked was well worth it. The Perkinses were so enthusiastic about CNO that they took the reins in 2005. Zach is now 8, and they also are parents to Miranda, 7, and Marissa, 5.
“Our kids have made friends, and we’ve watched other kids grow up,” Linda said. “I didn’t know many people, and now I feel like I know a million people from being a part of this.”
According to Linda, the CNO contact list has “been a blessing.” She and others have used it when in a bind and babysitting was needed on a non-CNO night.
“One time, we were on our way back from vacation. We didn’t even go home; we just dropped the kids off for CNO and went home and unpacked,” Linda said.
The traffic in Grace Hall was heavy on a recent Friday night, with kids coming and parents going.
Enrollment in the summer quarter is generally smaller, due to busy schedules with vacations and summer sports. Even so, more than 60 children ranging from infants to 11-year-olds were in attendance.
Kimberly Vance dropped off her son, Zachary, 5, saying, “I love you. Have so much fun.” And, in an instant, he was off to do just that.
Sara Walz and her four children, ranging from seven months to 7 years, walked in, and check-in attendant Sam Kilmer asked, “What are you doing tonight?”
Walz excitedly replied that she and her husband were building a fence. “Just gotta get the kids out of the way,” she said. “With no family around, I am the babysitter. So, trust me, I love this!” Because of a family emergency, her niece was welcomed with open arms, too.
By 7 p.m., the gym was the place to be.
Zach Kilmer, 7, was getting to do one of his favorite activities of CNO — basketball.
“I meet friends every time. It’s pretty cool,” he said. “For the parents, it’s also fun because they meet new parents. And they get to hang out with their kids when it’s their turn to work.”
His parents, Sam and Charlotte, were leading the babysitting team that evening, and had their two other children, Garrett, 10, and Ethan, 9 months, with them.
His friend, Zach Perkins, 8, quickly added, “Sometimes we get Popsicles outside for snacks … cheese puffs and a side of water.”
Like Zach Kilmer, he said he liked “hoops and stuff.”
Tina Renz was settled on the gym floor playing with one of the younger children. She and her husband, Tony, recently moved to the area from Louisville, Ky. They have two children, Elizabeth, 8, and Zachary, 5.
“I was reading the bulletin to find ways to get involved,” Tina said, “and I saw the announcement: ‘How would you like to get 20 free nights out a year in exchange for four babysitting rotations?’ I was like, hey, I don’t know any sitters, so I signed up the next day.”
The Renzes decided to work the first night and get their children adjusted. With no local family, Tina said it was “reassuring that it’s not strangers who will be watching our kids. Everybody’s from the parish.”
Two weeks later, the couple was to get the coveted date night. “I’d like to see a movie and do dinner — nothing fancy — just be able to talk without breaking up a fight,” she said.
Couples’ Night Out is limited to married couples and parishioners of Our Lady of Grace. Those interested in joining or learning more should contact Linda Perkins at 317-979-4429 or lperkins@wiley.com.
Members are required to take a safe conduct course through the church, and pay $5 per quarter to help offset supply costs.
Those interested in forming CNO at their local parish also may contact Perkins for information.